“Sinking Ship” CMT Loses $115 Million in Advertising: “First Drag Queens, Now This”

Country Music Television (CMT) made a whopper of a mistake when they allowed a drag performance at the CMT Music Awards. Half of the country world boycotted the event.

Advertisers like Pabst, the GAP, and McGregor Leather came close to walking away, but were assured by the network that it was a request from a performer and not the network “going woke.”

Unfortunately, that all changed when they decided to eighty-six Jason Aldean’s hit video, “Try That in a Small Town.”

Those advertisers, adding up to a whopping $115 million in annual revenue, have now fled the “sinking ship,” as Levi’s CEO Joe Barron called it. “It’s a shame because the network used to represent…you know…country.” A shame indeed.

McGregor was the biggest loss. According to their CEO, also named Joe Barron, (no relation) the typical country music-loving customer starts out with a nice jacket and ends up with a full gimp outfit. “The only thing we don’t sell is the ball gag,” said Barron.

Pabst is the next big hit. “We don’t really need to advertise,” said PR Specialist Art Tubolls, “our drinkers are more…generational. There are counties in Alabama that only sell PBR. Still, it’s a great write-off.” None of that has much to do with Jason Aldean or freedom, but we’re with you, PBR!

Hopefully, CMT will just cease to exist, just like Bud Light and Nike. God Bless America.

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